Death is a Natural Part of Life (and it's okay to talk about it)

Paula Span, who writes for the New York Times blog, The New Old Age, published a blog post the other day about groups, called Death Cafes, springing up all over the country that meet, not for end-of-life planning or grief support, but rather to discuss death philosophically:Why do we fear it?  What do we think it's like?  And maybe most importantly, how does our view of death inform the way we go about living our lives?

I read some years ago about the various café mortel (mortal cafe) that were being started in France and Switzerland for people to discuss their philosophies about death, and these groups in the U.S. are offshoots of that same basic idea.  Ms. Span's blog post is, I think, important reading for just about anybody, if for no other reason than that the subject of death, much like eldercare, is so completely taboo and riddled with superstition.  People often feel that talking about death invites it closer, just like my parents, who thought that if they even made out a will they'd keel over and die right on the spot.  I think these are necessary forums – necessary because death, like taxes, is inevitable.   It seems to me that when we confront the subjects that we're most afraid of, they take on less of a sinister overtone.  People have often said to me that, since death is inevitable, why talk about it?  I respond by saying that since it's inevitable, why not demystify it and explore our thoughts and feeling about it?

For me, this brings up what I consider to be the bigger issue: quality-of-life.  In this blogger's view, our society, because of equal parts guilt and liability, often extends people's lives far beyond any reasonable bounds.  Maybe groups like the Death Cafe will allow people to talk about death in a way that isn't superstitious, and allow us to look at death as a natural cessation of life function, particularly in cases where the lack of a real quality-of-life makes life not...well...life anymore.

Read Ms. Span's piece at: http://newoldage.blogs.nytimes.com/2013/06/16/death-be-not-decaffeinated-over-cup-groups-face-taboo/  and follow this and other resources at www.jamielegon.com/resources